[Music]
[音乐]
my darling
我亲爱的
girl my darling
女孩，我亲爱的
boy my beloved child
男孩，我心爱的孩子，
here I
我
am trying to
recover every day from your
每天都在努力从失去你的痛苦中恢复过来
loss and I hope someday that I may
，我希望有一天我能
know who hurt us so
知道是谁伤害了我们这么
much what have we done to
深，我们对他们做了什么
them someday I will know
有一天我会知道
[ 音乐]
why the most explosive dating experience
为什么一生中最爆炸性的约会经历
of a lifetime six red-blooded Bachelors
六个热血单身汉
looking for love with one stunning babe
寻找一个令人惊艳的宝贝的爱情
she's called Miriam and she's caused
她叫米里亚姆，
quite a controversy when she took part
当她
in a new dating show yes she's called
参加一个新的约会节目时引起了不小的争议是的，她叫
Miriam and is at the center of a massive
米里亚姆，是中心人物 据天空电视台报道，一场大规模的
Scandal just cost Sky Television
丑闻刚刚花费了
reported 3/4 of a million pound weeks
四分之三百万英镑，
they VI for her affections they kissed
他们六周来对她表达爱意，他们亲吻了
her apparently they got intimate with
她，显然他们和她很亲密，
her there is a secret that the guys
有一个男人
don't know
不知道的秘密
there something about Miriam was a
有事 关于 Miriam 是一部
massive
大规模
production Sky Had pumped a lot of money
制作的 Sky 投入了大量资金
into
it I was
有人
told very purposefully in a way that it
非常有目的地告诉我，这
was um fun in the sun reality dating
是一场阳光下的乐趣现实
show um in AA and um the winner would
约会秀，在 AA 中，获胜者将
get 10 grand and get spend a week on a
得到 10 万美元，和他们梦想中的女孩在游艇上度过一周，
yacht with the girl of their
dreams and we had this amazing luxury
我们有一座令人惊叹的豪华
Villa looking out over views of a beea
别墅，可以俯瞰海滩的景色，
that I heard was sometimes used as a
我听说那里有时被用作
location for filming pornos but I can't
拍摄色情片的地点，但我无法
confirm or deny
证实或 否认
that everything in TV at that time in
2003 was about pushing the
2003 年电视行业的一切都是在突破
boundaries and lots of different
界限，许多不同的
production companies trying to make
制作公司试图制作
shocking big
令人震惊的大
TV couple of days after starting I got
电视节目，开始几天后，我被
asked to come into an
要求去
office I was given an NDA asked to sign
办公室，他们给了我一份保密协议，要求我签署
it and they said okay we're going to
它， 他们说好吧我们要
tell you what the true purpose of of the
告诉你这个节目的真正目的
show is you know it is a reality Jason
是什么你知道这是杰森真人
show there is going to be six guys there
秀会有六个男人会有
is going to be a girl of their dreams
一个他们梦中的女孩
called
叫
Miriam the only difference
米里亚姆唯一的区别
is she has a
是 她有
[\h__\h] all right listen up Moos is that
鸡巴，听好了，Moos 是那把
gun that's
枪，
very I remember the first night that I
非常，我记得我第一次
met Miriam in the ballroom
在舞厅遇到 Miriam 的那天晚上，
scene I was the it girl uh Blonde Barbie
我是那个金发芭比娃娃，
bombshell and then she's like this
然后她就像这个
Latina sexy
拉丁性感
syen I was like oh I have
美女，我就像 哦，我有
competition the ballroom is a place
比赛，舞厅是
where all of our houses come
所有人 我们家的人聚
together and we compete and we make
在一起，我们竞争，我们
battle on the floor
在地板上战斗
we to tear this
我们撕毁它
now it was very underground it was very
现在它非常地下，非常
secret it felt good seeing other trans
秘密，看到其他跨性别
wom being celebrated and being treated
女性受到庆祝和
on a high
受到
level because that was just not reality
高水平的对待感觉很好 因为那不是现实，
that was just not how Society treated us
那不是社会对待我们的方式
Miriam was an
米丽亚姆是一场
extravaganza when it was her hay day
盛会，当那是她的黄金时代时，
there was a moment where she was walking
有那么一刻，她走在路上
and winning like every ball she went
，赢得胜利，就像她参加的每一个球一样，
to she was on a whole another level that
她完全处于另一个层次
I'm just like here and she was like
我就像在这里，她就像在
there I really couldn't understand how
那里，我真的无法理解
she looked so feminine without so many
她没有做过那么多整容手术怎么会看起来这么有女人味，
surgeries like I I wasn't jealous but I
我并不嫉妒，但我
was just
like I side hide her a little bit me I'm
就像我把她藏起来了一点，我在
here struggling having reconstructions
这里 努力进行重建，
having bot surgeries and this [\h__\h] has
进行机器人手术，这个婊子的
this little nose this high pitch voice
鼻子很小，声音很高，
that I had to pay $10,000 for and like
我不得不为她支付 10,000 美元，
this short little petite little body and
身材又矮又小，
I'm just like where the hell did she
我当时就想她到底是从哪里
come from
冒出来的，
but she wasn't out
但她不是 公开
publicly it's called living
露面这叫做
stealth we didn't go out telling people
隐身生活我们没有去 告诉人们
oh I'm trans you know oh I used to be a
哦我是变性人你知道哦我曾经是个
boy you know and I'm a girl like people
男孩你知道我是一个女孩就像人们
couldn't understand it so acceptance was
无法理解它所以接受
kind of weird for us like how could they
对我们来说有点奇怪就像他们怎么能
accept something that they really don't
接受他们真正不接受的东西 不
understand so I think we lived our lives
明白，所以我觉得我们的生活很
uh under the radar
低调
I'm going
to of course Miriam wanted to find
当然会的，米里亚姆想找到
love Miriam wanted a normal life you
真爱，米里亚姆想过上正常的生活，
know like any other woman out
就像其他女人一样
there I was 21 and living in New York at
那时我 21 岁，生活 当时我在纽约，
the
time out of the blue I got a call from a
突然接到一家
British television
英国电视
company they asked if I would be
公司的电话，他们问我是否有
interested in starring in a new reality
兴趣出演一部新的真人秀
TV series where six guys are in
电视连续剧，里面六个男人
competition to try and seduce a
互相竞争，试图勾引一个
beautiful
美丽的
woman the catch though was that the
女人。 是那个
beautiful woman would not be all that
美丽的女人并不像
the guys think she
那些男人想象的那样，
is it was too good a chance to miss
这是一个不容错过的好机会
so here it is folks we're lined up we're
所以现在我们排好队
ready to go this is going to be the
准备出发这将是一个
[\h__\h] night of our Lives
他妈的夜晚 我们的生活
cares a 20-year-old Aaron I just wanted
关心一个20岁的亚伦我只是想
to have fun very
有乐趣非常
outgoing attention seeking loud
外向的关注 寻找大声的
kind of felt like yeah a bit of a jest
感觉有点像是的，有点像开玩笑，
though just felt free and
只是感觉自由和
easy I was just excited at life just to
轻松，我只是对生活感到兴奋，只是
be out
为了出去，
about it was
这是
nonstop work hard play
不停地工作，努力
hard I remember being on the Underground
玩乐，我记得在地铁上去
heading to work and I just picked up the
上班，我 刚拿起
metro and there it was just this little
地铁，就看到一条小
advert that said um you know do you
广告，上面写着，嗯，你知道吗，你
fancy be on the television show
想上电视节目吗？
the premise was it was a dating
前提是这是一档相亲
show the prize was a chance of winning
节目，奖品是赢得
£10,000 and I was like absolutely you
10,000 英镑的机会，我当时就觉得绝对
know just pick up the phone and they
没错 拿起电话，他们
sent me an application that was
就给我发了一份申请表，
it I was 23 I spent a year and a half
我当时 23 岁，花了一年半的时间
traveling around the
环游
world came back
世界，回来后
and I was opening the mail and and I
我打开邮件，
come across this questionnaire so I was
看到了这份问卷，我
like this is a bit odd all addressed to
觉得这是一个 有点奇怪，都是给我写的，
me so I said to my mom do you know what
所以我问我妈妈，你知道
all this is about and she said oh I saw
这是怎么回事吗？她说，哦，我
an advert in the paper so I applied for
在报纸上看到一则广告，所以我申请了
You Toby and and I looked at her and I
You Toby，我看着她，感觉她
was just like that's mental and I was
疯了 我
like okay if I'm going down I'm taking
说如果我要下去的话，我会
you with me so I filled in this
带上你，所以我就填了 这份
questionnaire with her over a couple of
问卷调查是在她吃了几罐
tins and
罐头和
breakfast it was asking about thre Sims
早餐之后进行的，询问了三个模拟人生
and about sexual preference is and I
和性取向，我
remember one this has always stuck with
记得其中有一项一直困扰着
me this one if your best friend got with
我，如果你最好的朋友和
your
你
mom how would that make you feel and
妈妈在一起，你会有什么感觉，
straight I was like okay that's you know
直男 我当时想，好吧，你知道，
let's just let's just take a step back
让我们退一步来看看，
and let that sink
让我们
in thinking what do they want to hear
思考一下，他们想听到什么，
what's going to get you a little bit
什么能让你更
closer to being on the television
接近上电视
show I didn't hear anything for a very
节目，我好久没听到任何消息了 很
long time and then then all of a sudden
长时间，然后突然
I got a phone call to say Aaron we'd
我接到一个电话说 Aaron 我们
love to see you and um we'd love you to
很想见到你，嗯，我们希望你能
come in for an
来参加
audition G London
试镜 G London
baby the London
baby the London
hey we invited to a audition and I said
嘿，我们邀请你来试镜 我说
I said to my mother I said like you
我对我妈妈说，我说就像你一样，
youve already got me into this so
你已经让我陷入了这种境地，所以
there's no way I'm going by myself so
我不可能一个人去，所以
I'm dragging you with me
我会把你拖着一起去
I didn't know what to expect but there's
我不知道会发生什么，但事情就是
just so many lad there just re suddenly
这样 那里的很多小伙子突然
become SC well I'm actually a
就变成了 SC，其实我是个
professional gamber and I dream of of
职业赌徒 我梦想着
meeting a mother they have props and
见到一位母亲，他们有道具和
outfits Panic struck I was like I've got
服装，我惊慌失措，就像我
no
不
idea and we were told you've got 10
知道一样，我们被告知你
minutes in front of the camera do what
在镜头前有10分钟的时间做
you
want I was working in the kitchen at the
想做的事，当时我正在厨房工作
time so I just came up with this comedy
所以我基本上想出了这个喜剧
menu basically and that was great I just
菜单，这很棒，我刚
did 10 minutes talking about why I've
花了 10 分钟谈论为什么我
got a naval uniform and this is who
有海军制服，这就是
you're going to get well I'm just to
你要得到的，我只是为了
impress and um yeah and I
给人留下深刻印象，嗯 是的，
passed when we were casting for there's
我们在选角的时候我通过了，
something about Miriam we wanted to try
我们想尝试
and ensure that we had people who had
确保我们找到的人有
potentially Li views me would I
潜力，我会
regularly share like porn I love women
定期分享色情片，我喜欢女人，
of course more open-minded to different
当然，对不同于普通人的想法更开放
than say your average straight white
male in my past life yeah I us to be
我前世是个异性恋白人男性，是的，
popso I was a
我曾经是个
gladiator you could be really pretty
角斗士，你可以
like Holly vogs or really ugly like Joe
像 Holly Vogs 一样漂亮，也可以像 Joe
brand but I couldn't really give a [\h__\h]
Brand 一样丑陋，但我真的不在乎，
I'm just here for the 10 grand but when
我来这里只是为了 10,000 美元，但是 当
you are making those shows you do not
你制作这些节目时，
know until you are filming
你直到拍摄时才知道
it what is going to come out of
结果会怎样
it we were told to go to this airport to
我们被告知要去这个机场
catch this
flight and we'd all naturally went to
赶飞机，我们很自然地去了
bar and you're like you're on that TV
酒吧，就像和我一起上电视
show with me and we could you know you
节目一样，我们
could see the six
可以看到
I made an immediate connection with
我做的六个 与
Toby Toby actually in the auditions when
Toby Toby 的直接联系实际上在试镜中，当
we saw each other we almost did that you
我们见面时，我们几乎做到了这一点，你
know that run to each other oh you made
知道，我们跑向对方哦，你
it that is so
做到了，这
good so we're all on a massive Hive and
太棒了，所以我们都在一个巨大的蜂巢上，
you know giv a bit of a bro
你知道给一点 一个兄弟般的
hug and then
拥抱，然后
suddenly oh right guys we just need you
突然哦，好吧伙计们，我们只需要你
to sign the contracts all of a sudden
签署合同，突然之间
like just get brought straight back down
就像直接回到
to earth okay actually yeah there's a
现实一样，好吧，实际上，这其中有一个
serious element of it now
严肃的因素，现在
it wasn't a thin contract it was a big
它不是一个薄弱的合同，而是一个 大
contract they literally wanted it done
合同，他们真的想很快完成，
and dusted very
quickly we didn't know what we were
我们不知道我们
signing up for you know half Fs in a
签了什么，你知道，一半的 F 是用
language you don't really understand and
你不太懂的语言写的，
also you just trying to get on a flight
而且你只是想搭飞机
to chat superm model up and experience
去聊天超级模特 并体验
this reality TV so am I really going to
这个现实电视，所以我真的
say I disagree with that paragraph no
要说我不同意那段没有
sign
迹象
I Tred to be honest and everything I
我试图诚实，我所做的一切
say but there is a secret that the guys
但有一个秘密，男人
don't
不知道
know am a transexual
我是变性人
and uh I see myself as a girl because um
，呃，我把自己看作一个女孩，因为嗯，
I've been living like half of my life
我生命中的一半时间都是这样度过的，
the way I am right
now I don't have any
现在我不知道 '没有做任何
operation only this
手术，只有这个
he I love my life I love the way I am
他我爱我的生活，我喜欢我现在的样子
and that's the more important
，这是更重要的，
thing I met Miriam on location in the
我在牛肉店遇到了米里亚姆，
beefer
honestly I thought wow she's just really
老实说，我觉得哇，她真的
really beautiful and to be honest I
很漂亮，说实话，我
found that I was attracted to her
发现我 被她吸引
yeah Miriam had a real Superstar
是的，米里亚姆拥有真正的超级巨星
quality I think everybody on the crew
气质，我想剧组里的每个人都
just thought wow you know she's
觉得，哇，你知道她
amazing she was one of the first
很棒，她是第一个
transgender people to get on TV and she
出现在电视上的变性人之一，她
was was incredibly
非常
Brave I'm looking for love I'm looking
勇敢，我在寻找爱情 我正在
for the right person for me
寻找适合我的人，一个
someone who's
honest someone who can be there always
诚实的人，一个可以一直陪
for me you know when I need
在我身边的人，当我需要
him I'm up for right know there six guys
他的时候，我愿意接受他，现在有六个人，
so each one is different I got involved
所以每个人都是不同的，我
with there's something about medium
参与其中，这有点关于媒介
later on in
后来在
production I've been working as a
制作中我一直担任
psychiatrist for 11 years I was one of
作为一名精神科医生，我做了 11 年，是
the very few that was dealing with trans
极少数处理跨性别
issues most people at that time had no
问题的人之一。当时大多数人
real concept of trans or just saw it as
对跨性别没有真正的概念，或者只是把它看作是
lady boys or crossdressers or
人妖、异装癖者或易
transvestites two ladies having a
装癖者。两个女士在做
PE there were just people that were
PE，他们只是
laughed
嘲笑
at being trans
变性，
it was still a diagnosable mental
这仍然是一种可诊断的精神
illness and it just stopped being under
疾病，它只是不再被归类为
the the the sexual perversions looking
性变态，
at you now you look like a woman to me
现在你看起来像个女人，在我看来，
you're a bloke you're you're I'm
你是一个男人，你是，你是，我
physically a woman and I'm mentally
身体上是一个女人 而我精神上是
woman how does that make me a bloke what
女人，那怎么会让我成为一个男人呢
were you Bor
with if I a mother and you turn in front
如果我是一个母亲，你转过身来，
of my door and come in and say oh Mom I
走进我的门说，哦，妈妈，我
want to be a a boy now or you are a boy
现在想成为一个男孩，或者你是一个男孩，
you want to be a girl can I tell you
你 想成为一个女孩，我能告诉你一些
something I look for the right poison
事情吗，我寻找正确的毒药，
and try to poison you off before you me
并试图在你把我毒死之前毒死你，
off even the Mental Health Community
甚至精神健康社区的
psychiatrists didn't understand it the
精神病学家也不理解，
scathing a lot of people went abroad for
很多人出国
the operations a lot of people were
做手术 的人
going to private clinics but they were
去私人诊所，但他们
paying a fortune to get medicine um and
要花一大笔钱 得到药物治疗，嗯，并
there wasn't a lot of
没有得到很多
support the law says that they were male
支持，法律规定他们是男性，
but physically we're we're
但从身体上讲我们是
female um and we don't have any rights
女性，嗯，我们没有任何权利，
at all um in employment rights um
嗯，就业权利，嗯，
marriage rights no rights we were
婚姻权利，没有权利，我们是
ignorant back then and certainly TV and
当时很无知，当然电视和
media were really ignorant and that was
媒体也真的很无知，
my real fear when I saw the brief for
当我看到《关于米里亚姆的事》的简介时，我真的很担心，
the something about
Miriam the title of the show could
这个节目的标题
easily have been there's something
很容易就变成了“有一些
really weird and different strange and
非常奇怪和不同
unusual and you're going to be shocked
寻常的事情，你会
by it about Miriam really is the subtext
对 Miriam 感到震惊确实是
of it because from the get- goal the
它的潜台词，因为从一开始
audience knew that Miram was
观众就知道 Miram 是
trans I've been working as a qualified
跨性别者。我已经
doctor in Spain for 2 years now and I've
在西班牙当了两年的合格医生，并且
done a medical examination to Miriam and
已经做过体检 米里亚姆和
I can confirm that she's got uh
我可以确认，她
masculine genitals on screen we got a
在屏幕上有男性生殖器，我们找了一名
doctor to exam to basically LIF her skir
医生检查，基本上
make sure she was a man I mean it's one
确定她是个男人，我的意思是，这是
unethical and ridiculous and horrible
不道德的、荒谬的、可怕的
and disgusting and so many words I could
、令人厌恶的，我可以用很多词来形容她，
use but she's not a man she has me
但她 她不是一个男人 有我的
genitalia F the penis
生殖器 F 阴茎
seemed to be the punchline of a joke it
似乎是一个笑话的笑点这
wasn't a joke cuz it was Miriam and it
不是一个笑话因为这是米里亚姆这
was her life and it was his boys who
是她的生活而他的男孩们
didn't have the option to
没有选择
consent it was cruelty
同意这是残酷的
television I don't feel that I was cruel
电视我不 我不觉得我
in making it I feel I was incredibly
做这个很残忍，我觉得我太
naive Our intention for the show was for
天真了。我们制作这个节目的目的是让
viewers to watch it and relate to
观众在观看后与
Miriam's story and to the question will
米里亚姆的故事产生共鸣，并回答这样一个问题：
they still like me once they find out
一旦他们真正了解了我，他们还会喜欢我吗？
who I truly fully
[音乐 ]
[Applause]
[掌声]
am
come at last H okay
终于来了，好
fantastic we were just thought this is
极了，我们只是觉得这
amazing we know 2 million pound
太神奇了，我们知道200万英镑的
Mansion wow um and wow bring on the
豪宅哇，哇，带来
model the crew came uh producers came
模型，工作人员来了，制片人来了，
they point at the
他们指着
cameras and you're like okay so they're
摄像机，你就 就像好的所以他们
going to be filming us everywhere all
会一直到处拍摄我们
the time shotgun this pink Lil not
霰弹枪这个粉红色的Lil不是
because it's pink during that first
因为它是粉红色的在那个第一
night that is also the time where we
晚那也是我们
started to understand who was what and
开始明白谁是
who was
谁谁在
here shot shot oh
这里的时候射击哦
shotgun I would say four out of the six
霰弹枪我会 说六个人中有四个
were Lads Lads typical guys that were
是小伙子 小伙子们，典型的
out to go on parties chat up women hey
出去参加派对和女人聊天的男人，嘿
fellas give us a bit of time will you
伙计们，给我们一点时间好吗，
I'm a bit busy you know what I
我有点忙，你知道我的
mean Toms that sort of
意思，汤姆斯那种
cheeky chap with the the confidence and
自信和个性的厚脸皮的家伙，
the personality I would generally grav
我一般会 重力
towards just come out of drama school
朝向刚从戏剧学校毕业
and I'm looking to get back into drama
，我正寻求回到戏剧
school and he kind of became the leader
学校，他
of the group really almost immediately
几乎立刻就成为了这个团体的领导者，
should we [\h__\h] face I'm so up for it I'm
我们应该拉屎脸，我太为此了，我
[\h__\h] hand already they filled all the
已经他妈的手了 把所有的
fridges with alcohol that they thought
冰箱都装满了酒，他们认为这些酒
would last a week and wow did we pull
可以喝一个星期，哇，我们是不是把
the pin out and um we um we full on
酒瓶插销拔出来了，嗯，我们嗯，我们尽情地狂欢
partied
[音乐] 那是一场大
it was a it was it was Carnage you are
屠杀，你们是
[掌声] ]
he it was just a lad's holiday hanging
他那只是一个小伙子的假期，一起
out drinking telling stories singing
出去喝酒讲故事唱歌
songs being
silly we just became really close really
做傻事，我们就变得非常亲密非常
solid and I think that's why this this
牢固，我想这就是这个
Brotherhood was
兄弟会
born there was Scott who was a kickboxer
诞生的原因，斯科特是一名跆拳道运动员，
he would be the guy going to the bars
他会去酒吧
with the top level women you know he was
和顶级女人在一起你知道他是
the alpha male and then Dom is another
领头羊 男性，然后 Dom 是另一个
alpha male in a completely different way
完全不同的阿尔法男性，
you know raw Marines background but you
你知道原始的海军陆战队背景，但你
know he was very really open and nice
知道他非常开放、友善
and really laidback do you have a naked
和悠闲，你有裸体
B you all just get naked let's have a
B 吗，你们都脱光衣服，让我们去
naked bar what's um's that a naked bar a
裸体酒吧，那是什么 裸体酒吧
naked
裸体
bar I think getting naked together was
酒吧 我认为一起裸体
just more so to know heterosexuality
只是为了了解异性恋
ladies and gentlemen I believe that the
女士们先生们 我相信
call was made that we'd all sit here for
我们所有人在这里坐
5 minutes and be naked by bearing all
5 分钟 赤身裸体 承受一切
you know there was more meanings more
你知道这更有意义
meanings than one but you know by
不止一个意思，但你知道，
bearing all we got nothing nothing to
忍受这一切，我们什么也没有，
hide in front of each other this is
在彼此面前什么也不需要隐藏，这
really gay man no guys we want a shot
真的很同性恋，伙计，不，我们想
from that camera this is really gay
从那个相机里拍一张，这真的很同性恋，
think about sitting down I found Mark to
想想坐下来，我发现马克有点
be a bit more
reserved he was always kind of looking
他总是比较内敛，
in is this something that I want to be
这是我想
involved in he didn't always seem
参与的事情吗？他似乎并不总是
completely connected with the group you
与这个团体完全联系在一起，你
were born naked you're going to die
生来赤裸，你死后也会
naked [\h__\h] nak as I remember the
赤裸裸地死去，他妈的裸体，我记得
brief producers wanted to push the
制作人想要的简短
boundaries of sexuality and to see that
突破性的界限，认识到
gender wasn't necessarily linked to
性别与性取向并不一定相关，
sexual
ity but I don't think there was enough
但我不认为 我们已经考虑了足够多的
thought given to what the outcome could
问题，
be both cameras are on us you know what
两个摄像机都对着我们，你知道
I'm
我在
saying oh where's Mark believing to
说什么吗，马克在哪里相信
think he's a [\h__\h] Mark's a [\h__\h] come
自己是个同性恋，马克是个同性恋，
on Mark it's only a semi they were not
拜托，马克，这只是一场半决赛，他们不是
the boys you should have put in a show
你应该拥有的男孩 放一个节目
to explore gender and sexuality they
来探索性别和性取向他们
were the boys you put in a show to see
是男孩你放一个节目来看看有
how many girls that can shag she [\h__\h]
多少女孩可以做爱她他妈的
freak she'll either hide in her bedroom
怪胎她要么躲在她的卧室里
or she'll [\h__\h] be out here sucking
要么她他妈的会在这里吮吸
but they were very of their
但是 他们非常符合他们的
time the world just seemed to be full of
时代，这个世界似乎充满了
lads being G was
男性，G
still not very accepted um and gender
仍然不太被接受，嗯，性别
was you you were a man or you were a
就是你是男人，你是
woman or you were you know a
女人，或者你是
hermaphrodite inter sex that was it very
雌雄同体的跨性别者，这是非常
binary you mind about we in the pool no
二元的 你介意我们在游泳池里吗不
fill your boots mate fill your [\h__\h]
填满你的靴子伙伴填满你的
boots you're not going to change
靴子你不会改变
somebody's m in a 3 we holiday to I
别人的m在一个3我们假期我
bether with a whole bunch of other
和一大群其他
Lads changing people's opinions is like
小伙子改变人们的观点就像
turning a super tanker and and and it
把一艘超级油轮和 和 这
takes a long time and it's B SL this
需要很长时间，而且是 B SL，
they were trying to do a speedboat right
他们试图做快艇
speedboat right hand
turn and I think that's what you
右转，我想这就是你
backfired my main role was to set up the
适得其反的原因，我的主要角色是设置
challenges almost like a challenge
挑战，几乎像一个挑战
producer
制作人，
that first challenge was designed to be
第一个挑战旨在 这是
the first time the boys see
男孩们第一次见到
Miriam gentlemen it's the moment you've
Miriam 先生们这是你们
all been waiting for if you take a look
期待已久的时刻如果你看
behind my shoulder you will see a
我肩膀后面你会看到一艘
luxurious yacht I want to see the first
豪华游艇我想看到第一个
man to swim out to that yacht to get to
游到那艘游艇上找到
Miriam and get the first
Miriam 的男人 并获得
kiss go
初吻去
the challenges Were Meant to prove the
挑战是为了证明
boys prowess their character and Miriam
男孩们的实力，他们的角色和米里亚姆
would be able to get something by seeing
将能够通过看到男孩们的表演得到一些东西，
the boys
perform it was like bam this is the this
就像bam这就是这
is the show this is the money you're
是表演这就是钱你' 你
trying to win this is the woman you're
想赢，这是你
trying to win this is a
想赢的女人，这是一场
competition whoever won those challenges
比赛，无论谁赢得了这些挑战，
would win dates with the model uh that
都会赢得与模特的约会，呃，
we could lay on thick I suppose
我想我们可以厚着脸皮说
and then you can see Mark being carted
，然后你就会看到马克被
off past in the safety
安全带走了
boat and I thought Mark's not made it
船，我以为马克没能成功，
you're not going to be last so you just
你不会 是最后一个，所以你
got to get there oh my God I'm Tom nice
必须到达那里哦天哪我是汤姆很好
me Tom was a lifeguard at the time so
我汤姆当时是一名救生员所以
straight away you know he's one I don't
你马上就知道他是其中之一我不
know where I got that spout of energy
知道我从哪里得到了那种能量，
from well I do actually I saw the girl
事实上我知道 看到那个女孩
standing on the deck and I just thought
站在甲板上，我就想，
well I'm going for
好吧，我要去
it I came third against the Royal marine
争取。我在皇家海军陆战队
and the lifeguard so I think I did
和救生员的比赛中获得了第三名，所以我认为我做得
fairly
相当
well and I kissed her on both cheeks and
不错，我亲吻了她的双颊，
and I said you know fantastic to meet
我说，你知道吗，太棒了 见到
you ALB panting trying to hold my breath
你 ALB 气喘吁吁试图屏住呼吸
camera crew boat rocking around I'm hung
摄制组船摇晃着我
over had a chat with her and then I was
宿醉和她聊了聊然后我
ushered to the front of the
被领到船的前面
boat and I'm sat there and I was
我坐在那里我
thinking this is really
觉得这真的很
odd but I also thought in the back of my
奇怪但是 我心里也想，
mind that it was a sky one reality TV
这是一档 Sky One 真人秀
show and it's a sky one that was trying
节目，它想让
to make a name for itself so it was
自己出名，所以
coming up with all sorts of crazy
想出了各种疯狂的
stuff Dom and Tom were chilling out we
东西，Dom 和 Tom 正在放松，我们
didn't have a mic on us because we'd get
我们没有带麦克风，因为
the mic wet and I said to them be weary
麦克风会弄湿，我告诉他们要小心
of her because I think she might be a
她 因为我觉得她可能是个
male don't say anything because I you
男人，所以什么也别说，因为我
know I'm not too sure myself but both of
知道我自己也不太确定，但他们
them were like no you're talking rubbish
俩都说不，你在胡说八道
oh he's finally arriv where have you
哦，他终于到了，你
been I've been around good evening Madam
去哪儿了，我一直都很好 晚上好，女士，
all
right yeah sure I I think they believed
好的，当然，我认为他们相信
the hype you look
炒作，你看起来很
beautiful they believed how the TV show
漂亮，他们相信电视节目
Port
Port
trador everybody completely immersed in
trador 每个人都完全沉浸在
the environment the producers
制作人
created so that's why I did what I
创造的环境中，所以这就是为什么我做了我
did and
所做的，
I and I'm Shing to yourself
我和我是 Shing 对自己
I have a lot of dreams I'm a
我有很多梦想 我是一个
dreamer one of my dreams is like I just
梦想家 我的梦想之一就是我
want to be like my
想成为像我
mom have a house have a family and be
妈妈一样 有一个房子 一个家庭 和
with my
我的
husband she had this quality that I've
丈夫在一起 她拥有我
never seen in anyone else ever that was
从未拥有过的品质 有没有在别人身上看到过这种有
magnetic and almost Supernatural
磁性的、几乎是超自然的东西，
so this is from deep in the
所以这是从档案深处来的
archive and I haven't looked at this for
，我已经 20 年没看过了，
20
years
so that's the girls in their
那是坐在
limo there she is that's
豪华轿车里的女孩，那是
Miriam what year was this so This was
米里亚姆，那是哪一年，所以这是
done in
完成的
2001 we were creating a manufactured
2001 年，我们创建了一个制造
band but it was a trans girl
乐队，但这是一个跨性别女子
band speed angels have the potential to
乐队，速度天使有潜力
be the most beautiful controversial sexy
成为有史以来最美丽、最有争议、最性感、最有
charismatic and enchanting girl band
魅力、最迷人的女子乐队，
ever we wanted to get everybody thinking
我们想让每个人都思考
about what it is to be a man what it is
作为一个男人是什么感觉，
to be a woman and just accept each other
作为一个女人是什么感觉，然后接受 彼此
as we are
就像我们一样，
they're all different characters like
她们都是不同的角色，比如
Spice
Girls this is Miriam top dollar ghetto
辣妹组合，这是米里亚姆，贫民窟最昂贵的
fabulous gangster girl Mistress of the
美女匪帮女孩，
Double Deal loves cash
双重交易的女主人喜欢
money she liked that ghetto fabulous
现金，她喜欢那个贫民窟的
thing
美女，
bling there was a lot of hatred around
trans issues at the time
当时人们对跨性别问题有很多仇恨
was a
就像一把
whisk and it it it fell
搅拌器，它就
apart but then brighter pictures who
散了，但后来，
were part of enderal were interested in
作为 Enderal 的一部分的 Brighter Pictures 对 Miriam 产生了兴趣，
Miriam because they were developing a
因为他们正在开发一个
reality TV
真人秀
show we were a gay company working in
节目，我们是一家在布里克斯顿工作的同性恋公司，
Brixton we were very diverse we'd made
我们非常多元化，我们做到了
the first black music show for Channel 4
为第四频道制作的第一档黑人音乐节目，
we'd made the first Asian pop culture
我们为 BBC 制作了第一档亚洲流行文化
show for the BBC so we were always
节目，所以我们一直在
exploring the edges of
探索社会的边缘，
society and the trick to getting a new
而获得新
show commissioned was always having a
节目委托的诀窍就是总是有
new
新的
twist the top line was six guys try and
转折，最上面的是六个人 尝试和
date the woman of their
他们的女人约会
dreams and discover she is a
梦到她是个
man so the word man was used and I think
男人，所以用了“男人”这个词，我认为
we have to kind of own
我们必须承认
this because otherwise we just never we
这一点，否则我们永远
will never learn we were not using words
不会学会，我们没有使用
like trans transgender transwoman trans
像跨性别、跨性别女人、跨性别
man cisgender we know differently
男人、顺性别这样的词，我们现在知道不同了，
now Sky wanted that show because it was
天空想要 那个节目因为它是
headlining explosive oh we're doing
头条新闻爆炸性哦我们在做
something different and this will be
一些不同的事情，这将是
shocking talked about TV
令人震惊的谈论电视
when you heard about the
当你听到这个
idea did you have any reservations about
想法时你对此有任何保留意见
it no I didn't I thought it was a good
没有我没有我认为这是个好
idea I think Miriam saw it as an
主意我认为米里亚姆 她把它看作一个
opportunity she wanted success she
机会，她想要成功，她
wanted to be
想要
famous she craved Limelight she's like
出名，她渴望成为众人瞩目的焦点，她就像
Princess Diana or Marin
戴安娜王妃或马林
·
Monroe and it's usually as a form of
梦露，这通常是一种
validation I think she suffered a lot
认可的形式，我认为她年轻时受了很多苦
when she was young and she'd suffered to
，她也受了很多苦
be who she wanted to
成为她想成为的人
be when I was 11 years old I started
当我 11 岁的时候，我开始
taking
服用
hormones when I was 16 I was living as a
激素，当我 16 岁的时候，我以女孩的身份生活
girl and going to high school in
，在加利福尼亚上高中，
California all the other girls were
其他女孩都在
dating and I wanted a boy
约会，我也想要一个男孩，
too then one day I met this boy at
然后一个 有一天我在学校遇见了一个男孩，
school he was so cute I was so in
他太可爱了， 有
love one night then we were foing around
一天晚上我们非常相爱，然后我们开始鬼混，
he discovered my secret he was really
他发现了我的秘密，他非常
angry I was so
生气，我很
frightened he spread the news all around
害怕，他把这个消息传遍了整个
school I had no choice but to leave I
学校，我别无选择，只能离开，我
felt so lost and lonely
感到如此失落和孤独
We Were
我们曾经
Young We Were
年轻 我们曾是
Free We Were
自由的，我们曾是
Young teeth clean
年轻的，牙齿干净的，
Li call
李打电话给
me she's
我，她是
the for us as production staff the more
我们作为制作人员，
time that we spent around the boys than
我们花在男孩身上的时间比
the boys spent around Miriam it was
男孩花在米里亚姆身上的时间多，
getting mindboggling hard to try and
试图
keep Miriam secret a
保守米里亚姆的
secret we were just told you can't tell
秘密变得难以置信的困难，我们刚刚被告知 你不能
any lies but don't ever say he or she
撒谎，但永远不要说他或她，
you know you need to say Miriam is a
你知道你需要说米里亚姆是一个
really beautiful person you know so that
非常美丽的人，你知道，这样
the deceit or the format that could
欺骗或格式才能
carry on on being
继续
perpetuated the whole Villa was covered
延续，整个别墅都笼罩
with
着
cameras and those that were monitoring
摄像头和监控
the cameras I had a walkie-talkie so if
摄像头的人我有一个对讲机，所以如果有
anything should happen I got a call in
什么事情发生，我会打电话到
unit need to go and sort this
单位去解决这个问题
out I was on call 24 hours a day making
我每天24小时待命，
sure the barriers weren't
确保屏障不会被
broken each guy almost had their own
破坏每个人都 几乎有自己的
team that followed them around
团队跟着他们
interviewed them how do you feel about
采访他们你感觉如何 关于
that all that kind of stuff she didn't
所有这些事情，她没有
ask easy questions to be honest typical
问简单的问题，说实话，典型的
women questions the dates were so
女人的问题，约会受到如此
heavily
严格的
monitored they hard to spent any time
监控，他们很难在一起度过任何
together that wasn't filmed so anything
没有被拍摄的时间，所以
that they said was on camera wow well I
他们说的任何话都在镜头里，哇，我
hope you amazing
希望 你太棒了，
hello yeah you like I think we have a
你好，是的，你喜欢，我想我们已经有一个
winner already oh well I know you like
赢家了，哦，好吧，我知道你喜欢
your sweet stuff yeah so bonus to
你的甜食，是的，所以对我来说是额外的奖励，
me did you fantasy Miriam yeah I did
你幻想过米里亚姆，是的，是
yeah Miriam was very attractive so it's
的，米里亚姆非常有吸引力，所以
it's hard to say that I didn't and the
很难说我没有
problem with me is I like I'd meet
我的问题是我喜欢我遇到
somebody and I could fall in love that
一个人，然后那天晚上我就爱上她了，
night I like that kind of um that dark
我喜欢那种，那种
that dark kind of skin lovely white
深色的皮肤，那种漂亮的白
teeth eyes face she's got one of them
牙齿，那种眼睛，那种脸，她有一种
glows is she She Glows she's got
光芒，她光芒四射 有
smashing tits
漂亮的乳房，
as I just love to Shag really i' love
因为我只是喜欢做爱，我真的很喜欢
just to
get Scott was a typical alpha male
斯科特是一个典型的阿尔法男性
and he is perfect in every way he does
，他在各方面都很完美，他做
the right workouts he does the right
正确的锻炼，他做正确的
look after
routine but he wore his heart on his
日常护理，但他把他的心放在了他的
sleeve he was AB absolutely Smitten by
袖子上 AB 完全被他迷住了，
a he was exactly what the producers
他正是制片人
wanted I I think as as the day's gone on
想要的，我认为 随着时间
and each day has passed I think my
一天天过去，我觉得我
attracting towards you is um it's got
对你的吸引力
more and more um we still don't really
越来越大，嗯，我们仍然不太
know each other too well but I'm
了解对方，但
definitely attracted to you quite a lot
here I think we're very
我认为我在这里肯定被你吸引了不少 我们非常
beautiful I definitely tried my best at
漂亮我绝对尽我所能
warning people she's very trsic me the
警告人们她非常让我着迷我
one thing I said I mean the one thing I
说的一件事我的意思是我
go for most most of all first thing I
最追求的一件事最重要的是我看到的第一件事
see is the eyes Toby was always in your
是托比的眼睛总是在你
ear about what he thought was going on
耳边说他
he was really like don't you think and
他真的觉得发生了什么，你不觉得吗，
just now and again he just he' just come
只是偶尔他只是
out with with a little word like and
说了一句，然后
straight away a few of us were like
我们中的一些人马上就觉得
absolutely not there's no there's no
绝对不是，
need for them to do that the show is fun
他们没有必要 这样做节目就
enough we're giving the audience like
足够有趣了，我们为观众提供了
everything that they could sort of need
他们可能需要的一切
to be entertained
娱乐，
but Toby stuck with
但托比坚持了
it I never wanted to do harm by saying I
下来，我从来不想
think she's a transgender on camera
在镜头前说我认为她是个变性人，
because I might have got it wrong and I
因为我可能已经明白了 错了，我
would look like a bad person but but
会看起来像个坏人，但
more importantly I didn't really want to
更重要的是，我真的不想
hurt her
伤害她的
feelings but then Dom let lit um you
感情 但然后 Dom 让 lit um 你
know my thoughts in a mic
知道我的想法在麦克风里
do you still think she's a
你仍然认为她是一个
man you don't get up much Toby talking
男人你不经常起床 Toby
about have you ever met any women of you
谈论你有没有见过你的女人
you know I don't think he was playing to
你知道我不认为他在玩
the audience I think he was just having
观众，我认为他只是在
a bit of
banter but everything started changing
开玩笑，但一切
almost
几乎
immediately do you still think she's a
立即开始发生变化，你仍然认为她是一个
man you don't get
男人，你不会
upward met any I don't think any of us
向上遇到任何我不认为我们中的任何人会
ever thought that the boys would start
想到男孩们会
start to guess straight
开始猜测
away for the program makers and for the
对于节目制作人和频道来说，
channel it's high stakes you have to
这是一个高风险，你必须
understand this was a TV format that's
明白，这是一个
what the TV format was and they pumped
电视节目格式，他们投入了
like you know hundreds of thousands of
数十万
pounds into it one of you has tweaked
英镑，你们中的一个人稍微改变了
Miriam's interest a little bit more than
米里亚姆的兴趣 比
the other five is it going to be
其他五个多一点，是
Miriam I'm going to put tby today
米里亚姆吗？我要把今天
on the date no matter what I said she
放在约会上，不管我说什么，她都
wasn't happy I think when we chat that
不高兴，我想当我们
first time for the first 20 minutes I
第一次聊天的前 20 分钟，我
thought we' G really
以为我们'G真的
well
很好
T I'm tired no you understood though she
T我累了不你明白虽然她
definitely closed down and whether it
肯定关闭了，无论
was them telling her to close down or
是他们告诉她关闭，还是
whether it was herself deciding to close
她自己决定关闭，
down we will never know don't you
我们永远不会知道你
have cou toast for you you want me to do
没有 cou 吐司给你，你想让我做
you want any else with the chicken I'm
你还想要什么鸡肉，我有
fine you're not going to have any food
好吧你不会吃任何食物
I'm tired not anymore no there not short
我累了不再吃了不那里不缺
afraid that was so
怕那太
embarrassing oh man that was more a a
尴尬了哦天哪那更尴尬了
that was embarrassing
man oh man that was more
天哪那更尴尬了天哪
I can't remember
我记不清了
this that's raw emotion right there
这就是原始的情感，不是吗？
isn't it you know I wasn't in a good
你知道我当时心情不太好，
place obviously a bit stressed with it
显然有点紧张。
um Welcome to Hollywood I think as soon
嗯，欢迎来到好莱坞，我觉得
as it was out that I thought she might
这件事一出来，我就觉得她可能
be transgender I was set up for
是变性人 我注定要
failure no I feel bad because one of you
失败，不，我感觉很糟糕，因为你们其中一个人
have to
必须
live the one is going to
活下来，那个人将会
be
是，是
to yeah I was I was gutted absolutely
的，我当时非常沮丧，非常
gutted like for me Toby was my wingman
沮丧，就像对我来说，托比是我的僚机，
whenever I felt a little bit
每当我感到有点
intimidated or a bit out of my depth I
害怕或有点不知所措时 我
always kind of had him to lean
总是可以依靠他，
on so for him to go it was really
所以他 去吧，真的很
emotional but yeah it's all
感人，但是是的，这都是
because he
因为他
knew never
知道从来不
knew I could feel like this
知道我会有这种感觉，
like I've never
我从来没有
seen I want to vanish inside your
见过我想消失在你的
kiss every I'm Ling you more and more
吻里，我越来越喜欢你，
but I love you until my
但我爱 你直到我的
ding day
丁日
bra when a few more people got
胸罩当更多的人被
evicted it was okay I'm not getting rid
驱逐时没关系我不会
of you I'm still
摆脱你我仍然在
here maybe I I have got an opportunity
这里也许我有机会
to to go on and win this
继续赢得这
thing you must get so much attention at
件事你一定得到了很多关注
home no so gorgeous that's just me
家里没有那么华丽，那只是我，
normal like everybody
像其他人一样正常，
else are they like
他们像
you it was it was pretty innocent we
你一样，那是相当纯真的，我们
were all just hanging out
都只是一起出去玩，
together holding hands on the dates or
约会时牵着手，或者
kisses on cheeks it was real just you
亲吻脸颊，那是真实的，只是你
know just romanti sort of stuff out of
知道，只是罗曼蒂克之类的东西
all of us who do you like the
most so far
到目前为止，
yes go do you fy Miriam I I do fany
你最喜欢我们所有人中的谁是的，你喜欢 Miriam 吗？我很喜欢
Miriam yes I
Miriam 是的，我
do and then there was one night that
喜欢，然后有一个晚上
changed
改变了
everything you're really funny I like
一切 [音乐] 你真的很有趣我喜欢
you I think you you think similar to I
你我认为你你认为类似 我
think you know like about I can't
想你知道，我
remember why I was on the sofa maybe I
记不起我为什么坐在沙发上，也许我
was just being sneaky I knew they were
只是偷偷摸摸的，我知道他们快要
getting
close okay where's this going to go
亲近了，好吧，接下来会发生什么？
it must have been so difficult for you
when you first met us all I swam all
当你第一次见到我们时，你一定很难过，我游了那么
that way oh my God but it's worth it and
远，天哪，但这是值得的，
it's a lovely kiss as well you
这也是一个可爱的吻，你
know you kiss me did you what sorry you
知道你吻我你做了什么对不起你
I can kiss you now no what did you say
我现在可以吻你不你说了
what I said you kiss me I swam I swam
什么我说了你吻我我游了我一直游到我
all that way I think you should have
觉得你应该
kissed me really
吻我其实
they're really into each other like
他们真的很喜欢对方就像
quite it was quite it was quite hot sort
这样 当时我们俩马上就进入了热恋状态，
of into each
other straight away I was like yeah I
think I might have lost but I'll still
觉得我可能输了，但我仍然会努力
give it a good
shot I do remember being quite shocked
尝试，我记得当时我很震惊
of Tom's being allowed in such a
汤姆被允许和米里亚姆摆出如此
intimate position with
亲密的姿势
Miriam I don't think it's a problem you
我不认为这是个问题，你
know if Tom wants to you know be kissing
知道，如果汤姆想亲吻
transgender women that's absolutely fine
变性女性，那完全没问题，
right um but it's the fact that he
但事实是，他
didn't know that he was um and that was
不知道自己是变性人，这是
part of the construct of the TV show
电视剧结构的一部分
that I found
我觉得
uncomfortable surely somebody somewhere
不舒服，肯定有人在某个地方
must have been able to see that this was
看到这个 是
a stupid
一个愚蠢的
idea and no one's thought about this
想法，没有人想过这个问题，人们
this has been looked on so superficially
只是肤浅地看待这个问题，
and not really in depth and really or if
并没有真正深入地思考，或者说，如果这个
it has been is so naive and it comes
问题是真的，那么它就太天真了，它
from a perspective of naivity that's
来自一个天真的视角，
just bigger belief
if Tom discovers that she's trans he
如果汤姆发现她是跨性别者，那只会是一种更大的信念 他本
would have kicked
可以
off so there's people watching it every
开球，所以人们会看着他的每
single step of the way and thinking at
一个步骤，并想着
what point do I intervene at what point
我什么时候该介入，什么时候该
do I say come on pull it out because
说快点把球打出去，因为
they don't want to ruin the
他们不想破坏
game his hands were starting to wander
比赛，他的手开始 徘徊了
somewhat at which point I was asked to
一下，然后我被要求去
go and
intervene all of a sudden lights come on
干预，突然灯亮了，
crew come running in
工作人员跑了进来，
I can't remember my exact words to him
我不记得我对他说了什么，
but it was kind of you know it's not
但那是一种你知道这不是
that kind of show
那种表演，
ni I found it really
我发现 这真的很
strange the crew and the producers never
奇怪，剧组和制片人从来没有
been on Set uh the way they had that
像那天晚上那样出现过，
night this is a show for for her to find
这是一档让她找个
a man to find someone that she's
男人找个她感兴趣的人的节目，
interested
in the show seems to be
这个节目似乎很
working yet you you're stopping
成功，但你却停止了
it so it was okay what's what's
它 所以没关系，发生了什么事，
happening
here looking back immediately you can
回头看看，你马上就能
see what the producers are
看到 制作人正在
doing but I don't think they really knew
做，但我不认为他们真正了解
the gravity of what they'
他们所做的事情的严重性。
done it was a
这是一场
game games in general
游戏，一般来说，游戏都
involve
涉及
deception nobody expected it to end up
欺骗，没有人预料到它会以这样的结局结束，
like it
did before you claim the prize Miriam
在你领取奖品之前，米里亚姆
has something to say everything we had
有话要说 我们所做的一切
done it had all been build into
都是为了
this just went berserk absolutely lost
这个而建的，只是变得疯狂，完全失去了
it it was an utter [\h__\h] [\h__\h] show
它，这是一场彻头彻尾的狗屎秀